19 weeks.

This week babies are 6" long and the size of a large tomato.  No freakin way.   I think everything has been a big blur for the last month or so.  I'm very aware that I'm pregnant, what with the shooting back pain, pulled muscle in my inner thigh, and pelvic bone that feels like someone took a hammer to it, but I think we might be in the denial stage of things.

That said, we have made great strides... we picked out cribs and mattresses and pretty much figured out where everything will go in the nursery.  I busted my rear this morning to finish cleaning out the nursery, and my mom is going to help me steam clean the carpet next weekend.  After our u/s tomorrow (where we most importantly hopefully see healthy and happy babies, and maybe even confirm that B is a boy and find out what A is) we'll order furniture for the room.  Mr. M has plans to paint the closet doors over Thanksgiving, and then we should be ready to rock and roll.  There are lots of details left, but that will at least give us the essentials. :)

As usual, I'm a bit nervous about our u/s tomorrow.  It will be great to get to see them, but I'm nervous that we'll be rushed through like last time (where we didn't get our full hour and all the measurements).  I'm getting my full time come hell or high water tomorrow!  I'm also nervous because I have a work trip coming up, and I'm really not sure it's in my or the babies best interest to take 3-hour flights and work 12 hour days to come back to a hotel, let alone haul luggage, etc.  We'll see how tomorrow goes and I'll let the Dr. know what's been going on so we can make the best decision.  The only thing that really matters tomorrow is seeing healthy little babies growing on track. If that's happening, I'm a happy mama!

I've been feeling more fetal movement lately-- in fact both babies are kicking away as I type this right now.  So amazing.  You still can't feel them on the outside, but I'm hoping that happens soon so Mr. M can enjoy this too. I'm sure in lots of ways it's great to be the guy in this situation (see all of the pain mentioned above) but I also think it would suck.  It's such a miracle to have these little lives growing inside of me.  I just love them so much already.  SO very thankful for this blessing!!

My next mental milestone (6 weeks was one, then 12, then 14, then 16... don't ask me why... those are just the "benchmarks" I had in my head) is 20 weeks, soon followed by 24.  I really think I'll feel like I can breathe easier at 24, knowing we've made it to viability.  After that, 36.  I would love to keep these babies in until 38 (as long as the doctor will let me go) but I think 36 marks my "not scary anymore" time.  We want to do anything we can to make that happen.

Lots of stress in our household these last few weeks, and more to come.  We're hoping tomorrow is a happy note that helps wash away some of the stress, and then we're on a mission to make it until Thanksgiving.

18 Weeks

18 weeks! WOW!  That's halfway to 36.  I'd love to make it to 37 or 38, but 36 would be wonderful. I can't believe it's going by so fast. 

This week, I really noticed a growth spurt... I'm up 14 lbs according to our bathroom scale, and trying on clothes this week got a little depressing.  I know I'm not supposed to be fitting in my regular clothes... I mean, this is twins after all!  But still, I've been able to wear some of my regular shirts to this point since most are longer, but this week that all got crossed off of the list of options.  Every shirt is too short.  I wasn't counting on this so soon!  In a panic, I ordered several shirts online from Old Navy in hopes they will last a while.  I really don't want to have to buy a whole new wardrobe.  Also this week I tried on a pair of my sweatpants from last year that were huge on me.  And they were tight.  Like seriously tight all through the waist, hips, ass... you get the picture.  :(

In the last couple of days, I've felt the babies move even more, which is wonderful!  I've been pretty calm through all of this so far, not worrying much about the babies, but my nerves have started to pick up a bit in anticipation of our next appointment and the anatomy scan.  Looking back at some of the u/s pictures from last time, there is one 3D picture of B (and I KNOW full well that 3D ultrasounds will make things look like they're missing/fused/bumpy/etc.) where it looks like he might have three fingers on one hand.  The tech didn't mention it at all at our scan, and I'm sure it's just a weird shot, but it's starting to worry me.  To add to that, we got shortchanged last time b/c they didn't take us back until 30 min. late, so I'm already starting to think about next time.  Our appointment is a week from tomorrow-- it can't come soon enough!

Happy Halloween!!!

17 weeks. And movement!

Today marks 17 weeks. Crazy.  It hit me this week that we're almost halfway!  That's crazy.... and we need to get some stuff done!  This week the crib shopping picked up, and it's harder than I thought to find a crib that we can fit two of in the nursery on the wall I want them on... I thought this would be no big deal... ugh.

This week also marked the start of feeling movement!  The first time I felt it, I was falling back asleep in the middle of the night, and felt that butterfly feeling everyone says movement feels like.  Amazing.  Since then, I've felt what feels like tiny bubbles or popcorn popping.  It's not consistent yet, but I'm glad it's starting. :)

This week I also found out my job is changing.  I have no idea how yet (we're supposed to find out this week), but... ugh.  We waited to start TTC until I found a good position that allowed flexibility and didn't have a super-rigorous schedule... and that my all change.  And my boss (who is great) is applying for another position, so she may be gone too.  It wouldn't normally be this big of a deal, but with the possibility of bedrest, etc. I felt a whole lot better being in a department that knows me and would be willing to be flexible with my situation.  It's not just me-- it's the whole department-- we think they're splitting us up.  That should make for an interesting week.

Trying not to worry about it-- I'm trying to focus on the fact that I will still have a job, and it could be good.  There's nothing I can do about it right now, and the most important news is that we have two little blessings on the way-- that's the most important part.

Trying to have patience!

16 weeks.

Is that unreal to anyone but me?  16 feels like a big number.

This week,

• we saw our babies! again! never gets old. 
• we worked. hard. and a lot.
• we started cleaning out the babies' room... that's quite an endeavor...
• we made our first real baby purchases (two onesies from Old Navy, a baby gate that we will actually use for the dogs

I'm starting to feel big. HUGE, in fact.  And then I remind myself that I have a LONG way to go, so I'd better not freak out yet.  There are stretchmarks involved, people. That's not cool.  And my pre-pregnancy shirts aren't going to last much longer.  

The other fun development is that last night, I started to get a weird pain... the best way I can describe it is that it's a cross between doing the splits too far and sitting on a bicycle seat for too long.  It feels like it's in the tendons/ligaments at the very tops of my inner thighs.  Luckily, it's only when I move certain ways, but it's stuck around all day today.  If it's still here tomorrow, I'm calling the Dr's office.  I also have some back pain, but it's not bad.  Hoping these aren't permanent, because it's going to be a long 20+ more weeks if they are!!

At my Dr's appointment earlier this week, they also told me I would likely feel the babies soon... now every pinch, pull, bump, and flutter makes me wonder if it's a baby moving.  I've decided probably not, but you never know... here's to hoping I can feel them soon.

15 week appt. (10.11.10)

So this past Monday was our 15 week appointment.  We got a little shortchanged on our u/s as it was booked for an hour and we only got a half-hour.  The tech made sure we were booked for a full hour next time for our anatomy scan.

The great news is that both babies look wonderful!  We want to find out the babies' sexes, but won't tell anyone IRL, so when she asked if we would like for her to take a guess, we said YES!  Looks like B is pretty clearly a boy!  A is still unknown-- she said she thinks it may be a girl, but she couldn't get a good view.  We'll see at our next appt.  Cervix is in good position, weight gain is about 11 lbs, and heart rates are good.  Can't wait until our next appointment at 19 weeks!

14 weeks.

Holy crap! We made it to the 2nd trimester!! 

Nausea is starting to get better, but the heartburn is kicking in.  It seems like I'll have a good day and then a bad day.  I've actually thrown up more in the last two weeks than I did the whole rest of the 1st Tri!  I've gotten more of an appetite back, though, and don't have as many aversions.  It's a nice thing. :) My tummy now totally looks like a bump-- so much better than the extra chunky look I've been sporting for the last few weeks. I've also officially given up regular pants, and my tummy thanks me for it. :)

It's really fall now! The temps are cold, and this weekend I swapped out all of my clothes.  A lot got packed away until next year, but I was surprised to realize that a lot of my regular fall and winter clothes will likely get me through most of the fall. YAY!  I kept joking that I would have four things in my closet after I swapped the clothes out, and while I'm down to three pairs of work pants and one pair of jeans, I have a ton of tops and sweaters.  This weekend I also bought my first pair of maternity tights!  I have two maternity dresses, and when I wanted to wear one last week, I realized that I didn't have any tights... I ended up finding up one big pair without control top that worked... barely.  It's amazing how good it feels to have clothes that fit.

This past week we also shared our news with our extended families.  We're now completely "out," other than Facebook.  Our sisters are driving me crazy because they are upset that they can't post on FB about the babies yet, and don't get AT ALL that it's our news to share and we will choose when to share it.  They can tell anyone they want in person; we just don't want that news all over the internet yet.  Anyway, we called our grandparents on Wednesday night, and they were all happy to hear the news.  My dad's parents were the most excited-- these will be their first great grandchildren.  My grandma politely asked if she could tell my aunt, and I told her she could tell whoever she wanted.  News spread through the family pretty quickly after that. ;) So much fun!  We also sent an email sharing our news with Mr. M's family that went on our trip with us.  We got tons of emails back, thrilled to learn there were a couple of stowaways on the trip.

This coming week is a bit crazy... lots of work, Mr.M has a big week with his job as well, and next weekend we're going on a bit of a road trip... we'll see how that goes. :) A week from Monday, we get to see the bambinos again when we go in for our 16 w (15w1d) appointment. Can't wait! We listened to their little heartbeats last night with the doppler-- it's the best sound in the world.  We may even get to find out what we're having!  At our NT scan, the tech guessed that B was a boy, but it was pretty early to tell... I think it will be more real once we know :)

12 weeks. (and then some)

Thanks to a computer on the fritz, this is a little late, but a lot has happened!  Here are the highlights:

• Had an appointment at 11w4 days, and got a unexpected peek at the babies. YAY! Everyone looks great-- it's incredible to see that they look like BABIES now instead of shrimp :)
• Told Mr. M's parents. WONDERFUL!!  Apparently we did a good job of keeping things quiet and discrete on our vacation-- they didn't notice anything was up!
• Told my siblings.  We were going to do all the siblings the same day, but my brother was over at my parents house, and then when you tell one you can't not tell the other... so we did :)
• Went back and forth and back and forth again about the NT scan.  Couldn't make up our minds.  After lots of thought, we decided we wanted to do the u/s but not the bloodwork. (My insurance covered it, and who wouldn't want an extra-long u/s!)  I called to schedule it and they were pretty booked, but there was an opening that afternoon (Tuesday) so we rearranged our afternoons to make it.  Great pics of the babies, everything is right on mark, growing perfectly, arms, legs, fingers, perfect.  The u/s tech said they looked great, and then came right over to do the finger prick for the bloodwork.  It was so fast, I just did it, and Mr. M didn't stop me.  Afterwords we were worried a bit, but in the end we love these little guys already, and will love them no matter what.
• Told Mr. M's siblings. :) SO fun to tell!
• Told work.  I think people are in shock, but it's so nice to be "out."  I'm showing already, and have been having a hard time finding clothes that hide my growing tummy.  To be fair, I wasn't small to begin with, but my Dr. said that moms of twins measure 4-5 weeks ahead, so that makes me like a 16 or 17 week singleton mom.  So the fact that I've sworn off of regular pants is totally legit, right? ;)
• Got a call today from the genetics specialist, and in the end we're glad we did the bloodwork-- 1/10,000 risk (the lowest risk they give on the test) for BOTH babies for all three issues. What a relief!
• Counting the days to the weekend when we can tell more friends! and THIRTEEN weeks! woohoo!!